Cannamama Chats with Quinn
Last week, I asked some of the Mamas on our team to answer a couple of questions for me. It has always felt like a balm to hear other women’s experiences integrating cannabis and motherhood, so I hoped that sharing ours throughout this week might feel like that for some of you.
We have one more Cannamama Q+A to share and it's mine! I had a LOT of feelings writing about cannabis and motherhood and Jenna, so wisely, reminded me that it takes time to build trust in ourselves as moms. I am still so new to motherhood and she reminded me that I just need the practice trusting that I know best for my child. One day at a time, y’all.
How has motherhood changed your relationship with cannabis?
Motherhood is still very new to me - my baby is only 10 months old. Motherhood has changed my relationship to just about everything: work, my marriage, friendship, and definitely cannabis. Having so little time to myself and for rest, my cannabis use has become even more of a treasured ritual. Lighting up feels like coming back to myself in a lot of ways. I appreciate even more than I used to how important cannabis is for my mental health. The optimism it allows me to access when I feel so drained, the way the right strain cuts through fatigue and allows me to feel present and positive. I’ve experienced so much more self-inflicted shame around my cannabis use than I ever did before I became a mom. It’s hard to excavate those feelings; they run really deep. Our cultural perception of moms who smoke weed is so hurtful and I have to make a real effort not to allow myself to see myself through that lens. But it’s hard and I’d be lying if I said I was always successful at it. I question whether I’m being selfish, if I should rely on weed as much as I do, if I’m a bad mom. At the end of the day I know that I’m doing my best, that my son is deeply deeply loved, and that I have to care for myself in order to show up for him the way I want to.
How has cannabis impacted your experience of motherhood?
Cannabis reminds me of who I am beyond the fatigue and monotony of these early months. Motherhood has made me appreciate strength I didn’t know I had and cannabis allows me to tap into the the things that make me strong: laughing even when I’m exhausted, optimism even on tough days, incredible gratitude for this challenging but short season of life.
Thank you for reading along with us this week (or whenever you find these words). Moms who smoke weed are not bad moms. We deserve to release our internalized shame and trust that we are doing right by our children when we do right by ourselves.